8 things STILL on my home to-do list - plus Farrah Storr's home comforts
The one where I start asking for money
My advice to anyone who has just moved house? Do everything now. Don’t wait to buy that table or put up those shelves or knock this down or clear that out. Because if you wait, you’ll end up like me - ten months in and living within the four walls of your very own to-do list. Here are some of the things I told myself I’d get around to ‘once I’d settled in.’ Big mistake. (Huge).
The entrance - The house opposite me has two tidy bay trees framing the front door, a couple of healthy olive trees and currently, an autumnal wreath hanging from the door knocker. I gaze out at it from my living room in awe, because by contrast, the entrance to my house features one huge empty planter covered in cobwebs, a collection of dead trees in pots and stray pieces of rubbish that have blown out of my recycling bins.
The office - I am not a creature of habit it seems. One day, I will sit and work at the dining table; the next from a precariously high stool at the kitchen island and then - as the day progresses - from underneath a blanket on my sofa. None of it is very ergonomic or aspirational. I had planned to turn the box room into an office space, where I could pin things to the wall and swivel on a designer office chair and perhaps write in the the glow of an anglepoise lamp. But I didn’t. Instead, I just look at Elizabeth Day’s office and feel horribly envious.
Elizabeth Day’s office - I bet her to-do list is already to-done The nursery - I daydreamed long and hard about the artwork I would put up in Raff’s nursery when we moved in. Perhaps some beautiful animal illustrations; maybe a quirky Dr Seuss quote; or framed family photos. Personalised bunting, perhaps! But in the end? Nothing.
The stairs - The previous owners were so thoughtful that when they moved out, they gave me the measurements for the photo wall they’d put on the stairway, so that I could easily recreate it without needing to do much. I eagerly bought and hung the frames in the first week, but have since failed to fill any of them. I’m now left with a gallery of ghost inserts taunting me with their ‘Place Art Here’ stickers every time I go upstairs.
The shelves - When I visit friends’ houses these days, I notice that they have very grown-up looking shelves and fireplaces styled with a big glass vases, small collections of pretty shells and trinkets that somehow don’t look like clutter. I wanted to be one of those people in my new house – but I have failed. My shelves begin with promise but quickly become littered with toys, mugs, empty water glasses and random phone chargers. How does this not happen to other people? Where does all of their ‘stuff’ go?
Back gate - Do I need to use the back gate? No, not really. Should I know the code on the padlock to open the back gate? Yes, probably. One day I will invest the time and energy to resolve this, but until then, yes I shall be entering and leaving my house exclusively through the front door thank you very much.
The kitchen island - I have the kitchen island of dreams, honestly. Before I moved in, I pictured it with huge hurricane candles, fresh flowers and generous piles of fresh fruit and veg plucked straight from the famers market. The reality, as I look at it now, is half a lego transformer, a pile of unread post, a tub of Extra chewing gum and a collection of painkillers. This bothers me so much. And yet here we are.
One other thing I haven’t got around to? This newsletter. You may or may not have noticed that I’ve had, ahem, a bit of a break. What can I say - endless fertility treatment, a hectic full-time job and a two-year old took it out of me. But I’m back! And more than that, I’m back with a bang – and a plan. Going forward I’ll be writing my regular newsletter AND I’m going to add a more regular paid option (did I mention the price of fertility treatment?). So if anyone is feeling they need more Nesting in their lives, this is the place. Paid subscribers will get:
All my regular Nesting newsletters
Extra musings on whatever happens to be going on in my mind or my personal life
Special Nesting offers and competitions
Eternal love, respect and admiration from yours truly
And all for less than the price of your morning flat white - what are you waiting for?
HOME COMFORTS… with Farrah Storr
After a 22 year journalism career editing women’s glossies (Elle, Cosmo, Women’s Health), Farrah now writes my (and pretty much everyone’s) all-time favourite Substack newsletter, Things Worth Knowing.
Where do you live and how would you describe your home?
I’m out in the wilds of East Kent, in the United Kingdom, at the end of a small country lane. It is, to my mind anyway, a perfect haven.
Who is at home with you?
My husband, Will Storr, who is also a writer. I work upstairs; he is downstairs. Our two dogs - Parker and Jones, spend the mornings with me and the afternoon with ‘Dad.’
Current Netflix/Amazon obsession?
I very rarely watch TV. Though I do download an awful lot of old films when I’m travelling. I just watched The Sense Of An Ending on the way out to New York last week; and Brideshead Revisited (the 2008 version) on the way home. I can recommend both.
Best home comfort meal?
My husband makes a very good coq au vin. Though I believe he uses about two bottles of wine, which may explain why it always feels so good.
Best section of the Sunday papers?
Honestly, I mainly read my favourite journalists on Substack now. I find it’s a good place for ideas that might not have a home in mainstream media. Ex-BuzzFeed journalist, Ann Helen Petersen’s Culture Study is always interesting. Howard Jacobsen also has a beautiful Substack with the most wonderful prose. But I am partial to How To Spend It at the weekend. And I religiously buy House and Garden magazine.
Book currently on your bedside table?
There are a lot of things on my bedside table - a pillow spray that I am obsessed with that they use to spray the linens at the Byblos Hotel in St Tropez. A ‘contact’ helps me get hold of it. She is my linen spray dealer! A Rose Diptique candle that I never light; a small Hermes trinket tray filled with half a dozen hair bands; a Sisley lip balm that I put on before bed and piles of books. I’d love to say they were literary masterpieces but they are almost all coffee table books that I flick through before bed time as I’m usually too tired to read. There’s an interiors book on designer Robert Kime; a book on Japanese pruning; the collected columns of Vita Sackville West when she used to write the gardening column for The Observer. You get the idea…
Background noise in your house?
I work to classical musical and film scores. The Atonement film score is particularly good. Other than that it’s just silence or bird song. It’s why we moved out here in the first place.
Bath or shower?
I live for baths. We have one of those Japanese deep-soaking tubs which has its own little tray for cocktails or a cup of tea. It’s very civilised. If I want to read I’ll sit in there but my usual one-hour ritual takes place in the normal tub with mountains of bubbles (I love Neal’s Yard Geranium bubble bath).
Favourite house scent?
I adore fresh, herby smells. I have those reed diffuser things by Cire Trudon in most rooms - I love the And El Kader scent, which smells of mint tea. Loewe does beautiful candles too in lovely, earthy scents - garden pea, tomato leaves, beetroot. I’m addicted.
My garden is….
My sanctuary; the only place where I can stop and just ‘be.’
How well do you know your next door neighbours?
Not very. We live not far from a brain injury facility and so occasionally the patients will pass by our front lawn. It’s very moving to see these people build their strength back, step by step.
Your favourite home from home?
There is a cottage we stay in most years at Christmas time. It is quite literally in the middle of nowhere - in the farthest reaches of Scotland. The neighbours are deer; the only sound is snow falling from the roof and there is the sharp, clean scent of pine resin in the air. It is perfection.
Read Farrah’s newsletter Things Worth Knowing here.
HOME STUFF
The Week Pad
I got this Crispin Finn organiser as a present from a friend and probably didn’t give it the reception it deserved. It’s since saved my life multiple times and calmed my frazzled mind. It sits on my kitchen island (next to all the crap) and at a glance I can see everything that’s happening in my life this week. Simple, analogue genius. And the design is lovely.
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The cosiest blanket
As a serial sofa napper, I think investing in a good blanket is simple common sense. After much research, I’ve settled on this one from Heating & Plumbing London (bizarre brand name but Vogue loves them). It’s made from pure new wool and it’s machine washable (vital when sharing said blanket with a sausage dog). It also makes for a fabulous present if you opt for their personalisation service.
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Omaze
Ladies and gentlemen - welcome to my new home. It’s in Gleneagles and it will be mine, along with £100,000 of spending money when I win the Omaze competition in a week or so. I spend a lot of time these days watching videos of past winners and it’s now just a case of waiting for the phone call to come through. I am a living experiment as to whether manifesting actually works. Many friends tell me it’s a scam – and those friends shall not be invited to my housewarming in Gleneagles.
TV STUFF
Beckham
I think this documentary was supposed to be about football but I found it more about domesticity and how all the money in the world seems to make home life incrementally more uncomfortable. Imagine being so tidy that the smoke ring on the inside of a candle makes you lose sleep? This is David’s life! He waits until everybody has gone to bed and then goes around the house cleaning and trimming candle wicks. Where were the cosy sofas? The photos on the fridge? The general mess and clutter that make a family home a home? It all felt more Perching than Nesting. Perhaps they need to subscribe…?
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The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar
I was about 12 when I first read this Roald Dahl book and it totally fascinated me. So much so that I spent a full week trying to see with my eyes closed when I should have been doing my homework. I didn’t have the same luck as Henry Sugar though and alas I still haven’t become a billionaire. But Wes Anderson’s interpretation currently on Netflix is wonderful and made me want to try all over again.
BOOK STUFF
Malibu Rising
I find it almost impossible to read books these days, as it requires me to ignore my phone for longer than I am capable. But for Taylor Jenkins-Reid, I did it and I did it with pleasure. For anyone struggling to get back into reading, I recommend this as a genuine page-turner telling the story of four messed-up siblings living in sunny California. It’ll sweep you away from the drizzle straight into the dazzle.
That’s it for now folks! See you soon for the next edition, unless you’ve already become a paid subscriber (in which case, thank you, you’re my favourite and I’ll see you even sooner with a juicy piece about my current, ahem, situation, plus some other lovely bits and bobs just for you).
Dx
Who is Dominique Afacan?
A very good question. Dominique (that’s me) is a writer, solo mum and sausage dog slave based in London. The idea for the Nesting newsletter came about because after ten years of flitting around the world as a travel journalist, I wanted to share my new-found excitement about hanging out at home. I am also the author of Bolder – Life lessons from people older and wiser than you – a great Christmas present, if I don’t say so myself – and available to buy here.
P.S The illustration for Nesting was created by my exceptionally talented friend Julia Murray in New Zealand.
This made me lol! I loved the Beckham doc, but the candle wicks and the solo grilled mushroom that takes all day... rofl
Wow, Elizabeth Day's office is a dream!